


Man of Spiders, Son of Odin

by Justfanthings



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: 5+1 Things, Clint Barton Is a Good Bro, Fluff, Gen, Memes, Mjølnir, Pranks, Team Bonding, Team as Family, i guess
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-25
Updated: 2019-05-25
Packaged: 2020-03-17 02:00:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,867
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18955645
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Justfanthings/pseuds/Justfanthings
Summary: Thor and Peter want to relive some of the tension within the team, and they do it the only way an all powerful god and a teenager with an internet addiction can: pranks.Set in a magical place after civil war where the team comes back together because they deserve to be happy dammit.Some language but other than that all good fun!(Fair warning i wrote this in one sitting late at night in about three hours so I will, one day, go back and fix/add onto it)





	Man of Spiders, Son of Odin

**Author's Note:**

> Y’all this is my first time writing for this fandom and my first time publishing something not in first person so tell me what I did wrong please and thanks.

To say that Peter has control in his life is starting to feel like a joke. Sure he expected some pretty cool moments after he realized that the spider that bit him also gave him abs. But he hadn’t ever considered that he would become an avenger.  
He was just supposed to be a friendly NEIGHBORHOOD spider man. 

But here he was, post mission from taking down a giant rampaging monster Dr.Banner affectionately called “Abomination”.  
It had been him, Thor, and Hawkeye who had first responded to the call but it didn’t take long for the others to show up. Clint still insisted that they were the reasons the creature was taken down, despite Natasha getting in that final blow.  
Everyone had gathered at the compound to relax and stretch out sore muscles or, in Sams case, nurse wounds inflicted. Tony had spent the better part of ten minutes fussing over Peter to make sure he wasn’t hurt, with Steve and Bucky there to keep him still long enough for Tony to get a satisfactory check. Sometimes it still sent Peter reeling that the freaking avengers knew who he was in and out of costume. Eventually everyone had wandered over to the living room and were debating what movie they wanted to watch (“For the last time we are not watching Hot Tub Time Machine again Scott”) while Peter was dogging through the kitchen to feed his over active metabolism. 

While he was busy peering in the fridge his spider sense alerted him to someone approaching, figuring someone else wanted a snack he ignored it.  
At least until someone leaned in and whispered his name, nearly causing him to crawl up the wall in fright.

“Mr-Mr. Thor, you scared me.” He said turning around while breathing heavily. 

Thor chuckled lightly, “ My apologize man-of-spiders, I was merely trying to get your attention without alerting the others.” 

Peter furrowed his brow and cocked his head in lieu of any words as he was still trying to calm his heart.  
Thor’s demeanor softened to a more serious tone as he explained, “Ever since the rest of the Avengers have come back things have been... tense.” Peter nodded for him to go on, “I figured you would be the best to turn to for help. I wish to do something to lighten the mood around here, but I’m afraid most of my customs would kill them, aside from perhaps Rogers.”

“What did you have in mind.”  
Thor’s face took on a mischievous glint. 

“I want to try one of your earthly pranks”  
*************

The two spent almost ten minutes hashing out a plan, Tony became almost worried when he looked over from the groups viewing of Hot Tub Time Machine (god damn Scott and his stupid persuasion) to see the two bent over the counter whispering intently.  
But they finally managed to come up with a plan that had Thor almost squealing with joy. 

The first victim came the next morning and was sprung upon Clint Barton as he was trying to eat his Cheerios and read the paper in peace.  
Thor walked up behind him and, with Peter recording, asked a question that wound change the Avengers forever.  
“Man-of-hawks, could you hold this?” Thor asked holding out his infamous hammer, Mjolnir.

Clint, thinking it to be an innocent question, held out his hand without even looking up and promptly went down so hard his cereal flew from the table. 

Peter excitedly walked over to him while trying to contain his laughter, something Thor was failing miserably at, and looked down as Clint removed his hearing aids and closed his eyes. 

“I’m not even gonna bother.” He mumbled while still laying on the ground, oblivious to Peter and Thor utterly losing it. Thor later swore he saw a single tear trail down Clint’s cheek over his lost meal, something Clint vehemently denied. 

The two took enough pity to clean up the mess.  
“That was amazing.” Peter remarked as he threw the soggy cereal in the trash atop the empty Cheerios box.

********  
Victim two was Sam, he was playing a game in the living room, too engrossed in the race to notice either person who came up behind him. 

Peter shushed Thor with one hand and had his phone in the other to record the next act of treachery.  
“Son-of-will, could you home this for a moment?” Thor asked while Sam sighed and stuck out his hand rather angrily.  
Thor places the hammer in his palm and dodged as the controller went flying much like the cereal. 

Sam would later say time slowed down as he watched his his car veer of course while his body was pulled to the ground. He remembered looking up, feeling a sense of utter loss, and seeing Thor and Peter smile as his head met the ground. From that day forth Sam would no longer trust anyone while he was playing a game (which caused some trouble when Bruce set his lab on fire).

Peter at least had the decency to look guilty through his laughter, “Sorry Mr.Wilson, but your face is hilarious.” 

Oooh he was gonna get that kid.  
********  
Victim three was Natasha.  
She was in the kitchen making lunch, in the same position of Peter had been the night before, when the two assumed their positions.

Thor casually passed her and said, “Natasha, would you mi d carrying this for a moment.” 

She was the first to even glance their way, but she was so preoccupied with her meal she didn’t give it much thought and she, like those before her,held out her hand.  
The pickle jar she was holding smashed to the ground right after she did. The smell was something Tony wouldn’t be able to get rid of for weeks. 

Nat stood up immediately after and yelled so loud it was a wonder no one in Kentucky heard, “маленький паук, я доверял тебе” 

“Run Peter,” Thor said before she could get up, the video ended with Peters panicked breathing and Natasha’s hands taking his phone.  
Some say Peter still has nightmares from the look Natasha had on her face.

********  
Steve was just trying to read in the library with Bucky when It happened. The two were enjoying some more modern books from a series they had picked up together.

Peter and Thor had to have a quick but quiet debate over who should fall victim to the pair. Steve was decided to be the most trusting of the two.  
“Steve, could you hold this?” 

Steve, true to his nature held out his hand. Bucky looked over just in time to see Thor place Mjølnir in Steve’s unwitting palm. He gasped a sharp intake of breath and took a moment to struggle over whether to warn Steve or laugh. 

His struggle was cut short though when, for just a second or two, Steve was able to hold the hammer. That is until he, and the chair, tipped over and spilled onto the floor. 

The book that had been in Steve’s hand flew and smacked into Peter, once again cutting the video short.  
Bucky and Thor’s laughter was all either of them could hear from the floor as they thought through their shame. 

********  
Bruce was their last victim the duo targeted together, already their other videos were blowing up online so it was only a matter of time before the rest would catch on. 

The poor guy was just trying to work in his lab when the pair snuck into his sanctum.  
Peter was always welcome to work in there so Banner barely registered his appearance. He was also to absorbed in his work, much as Sam had been, to really notice Thor.  
“Hey Peter.” The tired scientist said.

“Hey Mr.Dr.Banner sir.” Even Peters overly polite greeting barely registered (what can the kid say this guy was his hero when it came to science). Peter backed away and let Thor come forward silently, “Could you, uh, hold this for me sir?”

Had it been any other time Bruce would have pointed out that he was holding chemicals that he really shouldn’t set down, but seeing as he was just writing a theory down he held out his hand, and like those before him, he fell. 

It was only after Thor had placed the hammer in his palm that they realize just how wrong this whole thing could go should they truly anger the good doctor. 

But when they bent over to see where he had fallen all they found was a man too tired to do anything more than stare at the ceiling in defeat. His eyes a shining beacon of exhaustion and betrayal.  
Juxtaposed with Peter and Thor’s giggles as they watching another victim fall.

********  
About a week after that fateful day Peter has come back to the compound to spend the weekend working on upgrades for his suit with Mr.Stark and hang out with the other hero’s more.  
The videos of their pranks had blown up so much that when they tried it on Wanda she had actually looked at what Thor was holding before she crossed her arms and glared at the pair (that video almost managed to beat out the one with Steve when it came to views, almost) so they gave up the prank as found out. The others had gathered with them later to watch all the videos together that night. 

Thor beamed with pride realizing that by the next day all the bickering between the team had been cut down significantly and was more half hearted and teasing than mean. 

Peter had had to spend most of the week explaining how he had met the avengers through his internship, but couldn’t say more than that (though Flash brought out every little thing trying to prove that Penis Parker couldn’t possibly know the avengers). 

But by Friday the school had died down about it enough that he could almost forget about them as he patiently tried to finish his homework at the table. 

So when Thor, with Clint and Natasha behind him (and the other fallen hero’s anticipating what would come from the kitchen) holding their phones out to record this, walked up behind him, Peter didn’t give it much thought. 

When Thor asked, rather sadly, “Young Peter, could you hold this for me?” He didn’t even think twice before holding out his hand in the same fashion as the others. 

However, unlike the others he did not fall, his papers did not go flying, and he did not have to lay on the floor and contemplate his life.  
Instead Peter felt a large item, that felt to light for its size, rest into his palm.

He only looked up from his work when Thor let out a choking sound and Clint dropped his phone, and Steve coughed.  
There, in Peter Parker’s teenage hand, lay Mjølnir, and his jaw dropped as his eyes widened upon noticing the object in his hand.

“That is so unfair.” Sam whined, hoping to see the kid fall. Even Bruce, though he felt bad, wanted to see him fall. 

All Peter could think to say was:  
“Holy shit.”

**Author's Note:**

> Natasha said: Little spider, I trusted you
> 
> Also I realize I’m a little late to the trend but whatever.


End file.
